lalas.

skool was pretty boring ehh. =(
except der concert part.
modern dance performances were great.=))
but, hais.. i reali hate havin assembly.. =/

i went back pri skool today.
my frens changed quite alot ehh.
i miss dem so much. but a few of dem wasnt here.=(
and kancana became like, err, more well build. lols.
and yihong's much prettier. guan kai and guan yu grew taller. =)) lols.

hais. juz like wat ive expected.
i didnt watch it wif him in de end. =(
im sad. i admit.. but im not reali disappointed.
cuz, i didnt haf much hopes. =))

ahhh~

y muz i fall asleep last nite? damn it.
i was so energetic lorr. im so useless..
wait for msg oso can wait until fall asleep. fark.

POA test was alrite larr.
but i almost went crazy..
i WONT sleep in klaz anymore.
NEVER. esp durin test. fark.

after skool went J8 wif sze, jesse, mp..
hahas. ate LJS and swensens.
we had lots of fun. and jesse is now my stead.=)) lalas.

hais. im so sad now. im a bad gurl.=(

i always appear perfectly fine in front of you.
cuz, i dun wan u to c me sad.
i dun wan u to c me cry.
i dun wan u to see der unhappy side of me.
all dat is juz bcuz,
i wan you to tink of me as a happy gurl. always.

Happy Birthday Yvonne~ =))

*yawns.

juz woke up. sians. so tired.
when i reach home, i bathe and i went straight to bed.
ahhhh. im so tiredd.

tml POA test. depreciation.
1st time im scared of a POA test. sian.
hope i can pass eh.. hais..

todays lessons were borin.
and gabriel choo is an irritatin bugger.
arghhh. he drove me crazy.~

hais. i hope, i wish and i pray.

boy. though dream is over..
will u rmb wat u haf promised me?

hmmm. i tink ive decided.
i tink i'll quit. =))

hmmm. i simply lurfe my cousins.
it has been quite a long time since i last saw dem.
bu we are still as close ehh. =))
thanks for all der encouragement..
and ting, dun worry, i'll definitely call you derr.
but always rmb, you are only sec2 horr. LOLs.

okie. i tink i shall belief it.
she say its not directin to me den i shall not tink too much.
let matter rest.. and c wat will happen nxt..
but btw, i hope dere'll oso be peace for my fren..
i dun wan her to be in any trouble..
if not, im not gonna stand and watch eh.

to my dear guide. its okie if u didnt noe i doted on you. mayb to u, it isnt larr. but wat im gonna tell u is, i trust you. i'll listen and belief you. reali gurl, dun disappoint me.

i tink everything is over..
and its good dat i din haf high hopes..
it was STILL a dream afterall..
im disappointed. but im alrite..
and dreams are over, time for reailty.. ONCE AGAIN..
boy, u caused all dis.. it was all ur carelessness..
i dun blame you. i noe u didnt mean it..
but knowin dat, it hurt me more..

arloes. x))

hmmm. lala. now at my cousin's hse. =))
today went for a so called 'road show' at TP.
sian lorr. its like, DEAD. gosh.
uncle hendry drove me and sook to toa payoh inter.
lols. we made a wrong choice to take his car. x)

but i seriously agree wif her blog.
i need to thank them i suppose.
dey let me realised dat hu r my true frens.
who's reali dere for me.. who stood up for me.. who speaked up for me.. and for u guys, who are supposed to me my closest grp of frens, where are u guys? i duno.. hidin behind? dun wanna get into any trouble? hmmm. its fine wif me.. you can stay out of it..actuli frm der start, i didnt expect anythg frm u guys.. i didnt wanna tell u guys anyway.. but i noe not all of you.. i noe one or two cares. i reali lurve you guys..

i dun care if i offended others. all i noe is ive done nth wrong. ive said, i sat dere, i did nth, i wanted no trouble but trouble came. i tot matters were supposed to end. but i duno y..things dun seem to get settled.. hais.. i duno.. nvm lorr. offend den offend. anythg. i WONT cry anymore.

lol. 'we got nth against you.' wats der reali meanin of dis ehh?

i duno wat to say. but i tink i created some trouble eh.. hmmm. or mayb not some. alot bah. lols. we sat dere and we juz wanted peace. too bad. trouble came.

i want to say nth bout it anymore. cuz i dun wanna act pity eh? anyway im not. all i can say is, y bring SO MANY ppl lor. =/ dun understand.

hmmm. somehow i need to thank dem eh? i realized dat so many ppl actuali is dere for me. thanks guys. lots. i duno how to say. glad, vonne, jy, sze, sook, naix, sweeying, pang jesse, tze, hl, gwen & blahh. lots and lots. im damn touched by pohee oso ehh. lols. =))

and thanks guys. i mean you noe hu u r larr.. okie larr. i noe u guys are neutral. im sorry i got u guys into some misunderstandin..

and to der guide: you've reali disappoint me. i doted on you so much. i speaked up for u so much. but i tink, my efforts are wasted.

damn.

gosh. i juz tink dat some ppl cant get der facts rite. hu is twistin der facts and hu is not. you noe it urself. liars juz go to hell.

thanks gurls. i owe it all to u guys. [jas.pang, sook and sweeying.] thanks.

nth much today. not in der mood. bye.=)

*dead.

argh. i'll flunk my a maths for sure.
1o1% sure. damn it. but nvm ler larr. =))

pe today was fun.
i had a great luff. gosh.
and i seriously tink dat der new china guy is reali freaky ehh. gosh.

after a maths common test went J8.
wif tze, jesse, ping, and vonne.
we crapped alot. bout OBM n OBS. lols.
i still cant make up my mind.. x))

i wanna play tic-tac-toe.
anyone interested? all u need is a penknife. =))

oh gosh. how? i duno wat to do.
so damn confused.. hais..

sians.

hmmm. 1stly, get well soon mummy. be back home real soon eh? miss ya lots.

ahhh. i dun wanna go skool anymore.
i cant stand skool anymore.
i duno y, i used to like it so much.
esp. POA. i used to like it so much..
but nowadays its makin me fall asleep.

went to 'study' today..
wif jesse, sze, vonne and glad..
in fact we didnt study much..
but we had lotsa fun larr. we luff like mad. lols.

i duno wat to do..
should i listen to der advice, and gif it a shot...?
hais.. wat if reali like wat she've said,
wat if he's so called snatched away? wtf.
im like so freakin confused. damn.

oh boy. im like damn confused now..
can you gimme some clue? im blurr.
can you somehow show me der way? im lost.

oh gosh.

i duno wat der farkin hell is wrong today.
nth is goin my way.. god damnit. fark.
so down and so depressed. damn.

sorry guys if i've scare you..
sorry guys if i've make you worry..
sze, xiao di, vonne, ning, sher, blah blah.
juz a word, thanks..
i noe i promised not to.. but i juz cant help it.
thanks for all der concern. sry to scare u guys.

i duno wats wrong. but i juz tink you guys haf sth against me. but i duno wat der hell did i do wrong. i seriously tink i didnt do anythg wrong.. god damn it. fark. but i juz hate it lor. anythg, juz say t once and for all. fark ir man. damn.

remember wat u've promised me?
unbreak my heart, boy.
unbreak your broken promise..
i wonder do you still rmb wat u've told me.
get her if you still like her boy.
i dun wanna see you sad.
if not, cant you juz let her go?
let everythg free.. gif ur heart another chance eh?

arghh.
network marketing? oh fark. damn.

suddenly it started to rain so heavily..
me, sook and pang got wet..
hais.. i juz recovered frm flu.
and i now i tink its comin backk. =(

lalas. i finally got my skool shoes. =))
after buyin my skool shoes,
me and sook went to united square..

lalas. uncle hendry is so nice.
he treat us dinner. again. lols..
i tink if we visit him more often, he'll go broke.
and i duno wat der hell is wrong wif him..
he kept insistin dat i have a boyfren. x)

lalas. my son has grown up and im so happy. x)
you shld noe why, son. =))
im so happy for him.. gees. so sweet eh.
but i duno y.. he's gettin more and more guai lan day by day. =p

oh boy. i reali wan to noe..
wat do i mean reali mean to you?
im seriously confused.

ahhhh~

im so damn tired today. gosh.
i was supposed to reach amk mrt at 830 in der mornin and i woke up at 805. gosh.. so rush lorr. kau ehh.. i took 15 mins to wash up and chiong outta der hse and hired a cab. gosh.. so tirin lorr. btw, it was for der damn flag day. =(

my 1st time doin flag day.
tiring.. but it was somehow enjoyable..
thnks to sze, huiying and songyih.
we had lots of fun ehh. =))
thanks guys. =))

lalas. my sia lan son kept his promise..
he brought coins and donated.. lalas.
oh yar, not forgettin Jy and Ck. =))
thanks ehh. =)) lalas.

yupp. sometimes i reali wonder.. why ppl dun treasure watever dey haf at der point of time and haf to end up regrettin when everythg's over. why aint dey together eh? and since its over, why cant let go and hold on? isit true dat it haf faded? aint he lettin go? some ppl juz dun realise how impt things are to dem until its reali gone.. and things dat u haf let go aint gonna get back to u so easily.. why didnt you grab der chance boy? why didnt you get hold of him gurl? hais.. confusin shit.

*grins.

nvr go skool today.
i was kinda sick ehh.
flu, stomach cramp, slight fever.
but fever gone off very soon.
lalas. lucky i nvr go skool gees.

i went for guides after skool.
i seriously tink i made a mistake..
i shall stay at home instead of goin dere and make myself angry.
i noe you guys are not happy
but i cant do anythg. im sorry.
dis is juz my job. i need to be strict.
i dun wanna scold u guys oso. hais..

lalas. got cip tml. sian..
hais.. 830. omg. hais..

thnks for ur concern..
thnks for ur msg.. i reali appreciate it. =))

ahhhh. i cant take it lerr. im sneezin like mad. omg.

damnit. i dont wanna go skool anymore.
i used to lurfe skool so much.
but it's all in der past.
i hate skool. lurfe it no more.
i hate you. wanna see you no more.

im not being crazy or stupid.
im not crappin or watever..
i dun wan to tink too much.
i dun dare to tink too much.
but i juz cant help thinking. im sry..

althou i noe its not a wrong to dream,
but i dun dare to. i dun dare to haf hope.
i dun wish for more.
i dun ask for more.
all i want is you, to be my fren.
my best fren. =)

thanks son. dont worry. i'll take care of myself and get well soon. =)) and i'll promise i'll not tink so much. =))

*sick.

hais. im down wif a flu. *ahchoo. =((
so damn bloody irritatin lorr.
i juz cant stay awake in klaz.
my head is like so heavy lorr. eyes keep closin.
den like so COLD. omg. i tink sth's wrong.
but i wan a fever somehow.=))

but im so happy somehow.
althou im sick.
thanks boy for der msg.
you brought my spirits high. x))

omg. yvonne is so noisy lorr.
how i wish i can glue her mouth up. =))

no matter wat i'll protect my dear gurl, jesse.
i dun care even my frens are on der BITCH's side.
im juz on jesse's side. dat BITCH is juz too much.
watever im gonna do, she's askin for it.
i dun care if she haf split personality or wat.
if she reali haf, im gonna help her by slappin and wak her up.
please larr, i DONT WAN t read ur blog too okie?
but too bad larr, hu ask u drag my dear gurl in? sad larr.
im not gonna STOP readin until u STOP writin bout my dear gurl.
i dun wan to noe stuff about ur BITCHY life either, juz for ur info. =))

ahhh. i miss my cheesycake & sweetie pie.

*grins. =/

im so high today ehh? hahas.
lalas. emaths common test. hmmm duno how lehh. lols.

i duno y but i kip fallin asleep today.
so damn tiredd.
and der lil turtle Colleen Zhen is irritatin ehh. lols. x))
lalas. i passed my eng sommon test~ =)) 19 ehh. gees.
oh ya. my xiao di is pregnant. x))

after skool today bought a tub of ice cream..
jesse, sze, sher and me ate in skool.
lalas. i had tummyache after dat.. lols.
my son's gonna make me dumplings ehh?

my pillar of strength is now called energybar.
lalas. MY SWEETIE PIE IS MISSIN~ i nvr c him very long lerr. =(

you've made me so happy. by accident.
lalas. thanks. again. x)) lalas. dear fren. =))

oh ya. not forgettin, cheefun, im not sia lan. im juz guai lan. der one hu is sia lan is you lorr. and stop bullying me okie? lalas. if not i COMPLAIN. lols. bleahs. =p

* yawns.

im dead beat. =((
juz reach home half and hour ago.
no business today. sians. tml wrkin again.
arggh. damn dat bloody guy. i cant take pressure for ur imformation. i got dat urge to juz gif u a scratch on ur face, den one ur screen. =))

i had an awful nite ytd..
i aint happy.
cuz, i cant seem to cheer my frens up.
sorry guys.. im juz useless. =((

lalas. im tinkin of nonsense. craps.
im not gonna get sad again.
at least not over him again. never.

ahh~ i miss my sweetie pie and cheesy cake.

lalas.

hmmm. a borin saturday. =(
one day of walkin. tirin. lols.
but indo food is not bad. lols. x))
and we almost tore down der whole neoprint shop..x)

i reached home kinda late today.
i was a good fren. i acc sher to work lor.
hahas. how sweet of me. =pp

hais. i reali dun wan him to misunderstand me. =((. im not a hypocrite. but i juz cant like, avoid her when she toks to me or sth. cuz its like, she's nice to me even thou i dun like her.. i cant be so bad ehh. =((.

hais. i reali dun wan to c my frens down ehh. =(. reali.. cheer up dudes. i hope u guys noe hu u are. i'll always be here. =)). lurfe you guys. muacks. =x

you've cheered me up. by accident. lols

gees.
i can forget about passin my geog common test. lols. =))

skool's borin. arghh.
even pon lessons oso very boredd lor.=(
im so damn irritated.x(

guides. hmmm. nth much lorr.
marchin. lalas.. im gettin der hang of it. =))
gees. today's simin's bday. lalas. so fun. lols.
but der meetin is juz, so-so lorr. =/

went J8 to haf dinner.
wif sze, tze and jesse.
and its like.. lols. sze reali make us damn pek chek. lols..
canot make it arhh. lmao. lols.
she make my luff till i got tummyache. lols.

ive got nth to say today. =(

i juz simply lurfe all.
- my sweetie pie
- my candy bar
- my pillar of strength
and last of all, i shall call u my cheesycake for der timebeing. =))
lalas. muackks. =))

* phew.

lucky it isnt wasted. lalas.
my mood has been up and down.
lols. i duno y leh.

ms lin is finally back frm her honeymoon.
lalas. or shld i say mrs low? lols.
oh yar. my klaz got a new boy today. =))

after skool stayed backk awhile for guides.
lalas. i skipped work. lols.
went study instead. omg. so guai ehh? lols.
tml geog common test leh. hais.

went to study at amk kfc.
wif, sze, jesse, jy, ck, cf and yj.
lalas. didnt study much ehh.
sth happened. and my hands were trembling.
i duno y oso. mayb i was too cold? crap.

i went home juz in time.
i managed to catch der show.
lalas. wilber is sooo cute. x))

hmmm. i seriously duno whether to belief anot.
should i? but dis is not der 1st time ehh? =/

lalas. im happy today.
im shocked ytd nite. lols.
im crazy.. i like it dis way.
lalas. we are frens.
i hope dis last. my dear fren.x)

lalas. i dun care. im not gonna study unless cheefun studies too. =p

lalas.
happy belated bday singapore. x))

didnt haf time to blog ytd as i came home late.
had lots of fun at yishun ehh.
lalas. accordin to Mark Lee, Yishun rawks. lols. x))

when we reach dere, i almost cant take it anymore..
i feel as if im gonna melt any moment..
der sun was blazin hot. damnit.
i at 1st tot it'll be borin.. but luckky its not.=))

it was kinda enjoyable i can say.
but thru out der whole thing, im damn hungry. lols.x))
without my friends, i wont be able to enjoy. =) thanks gurls.
we went super high at der last part dere.

lalas. twins so pretty~ i love dem. =))
after their performance, i went to haf supper.
finally. x)) hahas. i lurfe ban mian. lalas.

i love der fireworks. =))

but somehow tears filled my eyes.
when der fireworks blast off.
lookin at der firworks.
hearin der blast and der screams.
tears rolled down my cheeks..
wished dat you were next to me..

i was simply happy ytd. lalas.=)

* irritated.

hmmm. actuali i tink dere's no need to go skool today lor.
arghh. waste my time. so irritatin..
im easily irritated dis few days ehh. damn.

lalas. work overtime ytd. gosh.
im supposed to end work at 5..
but i ended at 9 plus instead. lalas.

i was shocked ytd nite..
lalas.. hmmm.. im reali very touched ehh.
thanks.. you've reali brighten up my night..
and i reali hope u meant wat u say. thanks ehh.=))

arghh. im reali irritated and offended.
its like, pls lorr, for god's sake..
i didnt do anythg to her and its like, wat exactly she wan?
lalas. i haf no idea either. =)
damn it. its like, its not der 1st time lorr.
and i simply nvr do anythg.. reali nth at all lorr..
seriously, wat haf i done wrong? i duno either. freak.

for now, i cant say dat u dont care.
thanks.. at least i noe dat you care..
thanks ehh my dear fren. =))

lalas.

went to 'study' wif jesse, sze, peiying and jieying today.
we did intend to study..
but der security chased us out.
he said, no self study allowed. freak him.
so, in de end we only did a little homework and borrwed a few books.

we went pastamania to haf our lunch.
vonne and meiping joined us..
yvonne look reali like a baby today. lalas. lols.
aftr dat we went esplanade..

we intend to go dere and take some pics.
but hu noes dere's fireworks.
so we stayed.. py left.. den ws joined us..
jesse, sze, Jy and me ran all der way to c der fireworks.
lols. we look as if we were crazy but it was reali nice.. =))
*how i wished you were dere.

anyway, thanks gurls. you guys made my day. =))

how i wished you were dere wif me.
watchin fireworks together wif me.
eww, how sweet. but dats all crapshit.
cuz, i noe, it'll nvr happen.

*stressed. =/

lalas. i dun even understand E-maths now.
im dead. i guess i can drop skool alr. lols.
i'll fail my chinese test too. so sadd.

i went to locker today.
i've got der shock of my life. lols..
i didnt noe he was callin me.
but he was in de end. but, hu cares? x))

1st day takin over guides and im goin crazy.
i tink i cant be a PL. im a failure i guess.
hais. i dun care alr.. dey can hate me for all dey wan.
im juz doin my job. doin wat im supposed to do.
hais. so stressed up. so farked up. =(

i guess things haf ended but still, you didnt care.
you are my fren from now.
my friend. only my friend.
i hope i can. =)

sorry. ive let you guys down.

if one day my pillar of strength is gone. how?
i haf no idea too. i'll break down i guess.
if one day he doesnt care bout me anymore,
i mite kill myself. and im serious..

lesson were borin today.
but i guess my mood aint rite too..
i tink i only like assembly.

sorry Jy. if im not workin today, i mite go over.

i was sad i admit.
but after dat i didnt feel anythg..
i guess i'm numb. i cant feel anymore.
i tot i was alrite. but i was wrong.
when i was alone. i cant keep it anymore.
once again, tears flooded my eyes..

this time round its real.
to belief or to doubt its up to you.
everythg will end today.
tml onwards you'll juz be my fren.
i'll try hard.. i juz need sometime..
allow me to cry all i want tonite.
allow all der slashes on my wrist one last time.
tml, everythg will be gone. and you, outa my mind.

- sorry guys if i cant keep my promise. sorry if i let you guys down again.

i could hold my tears no more.
when i tot my 'pillar of strength' was gone.
but i was lucky indeed. he was still dere.
i dont tink it'll be long. my instinct tells me so..

all i can say is dat i haf totally no mood for klaz today.
not even a single bit. i'll flunk my common test for sure.
esp chem.. but hu cares? i dont bother anymore.
life sucks.
but thanks xiao di and sher.
dun worry, im alrite ehh? =)

acc pang go work wif sook.
lalalas. me and pang played mini bball. so fun.x))
fun didnt last long. sth cropped up.
me and sook rushedd to PS.
damn it. i hate Zen micro now. gosh.

i tink it wont last long..
my hands are losin grip..
and yet you are still steppin on it.
can you stop doing dat? it hurts.
i'll let go. juz gimme some time.
you can hate me for all you can..
but you'll be free after dat..
i'll not bug you anymore then.

lala~ cheefun is still a small kid eh. haven grow upp. lalas.x) but, thanks kid, thanks for being dere. you are der reason behind my smile. =)

lalas. wilber rocks. sooo cute. i lurfe him. gees.

im actuali of a very good mood today.
but somehow, some ppl spoilt it.. too bad. just my luck.
mayb im fated dat i cant be happy thru out a day. =(
sad case ehh? hais.. hu cares.. used to it lerr.

lalala~ i slept thru out chem.. gees..
i reali hope dat i can drop chem.
so dat i dun need to c dat bitch's face.
its reali a torture for me.. =(

gees. it has been a long time,
since i last stayed back and watch a soccer match.. gees.
lalalas~

i reali hope dat der crazy bitch can stop all her nonsense.
hope she can juz accept der fact dat, he love no more..
and she better keep her freakin mouth shut,
and stop spreadin rumours bout my dear gurl,
before we do anythg nasty to her.. =) [cheer up my dear gurl =)]
and last of all, he doesnt deserve der slap at all.. poor boy.
dat crazy bitch it der one dat ought to be slapped.
no use sittin on der corridoors and cry,
yup, you can attract alot of ppl's attention,
but i assure you, dis will make him hate you more.

i hate to hear ppl tellin me dat dey saw you and her..
but i'll die if im der one seein it..
i will juz break down and cry..
but, i guess i can only accept it..
i cant do anythg now..
and i juz lurfe der way we are now i guess.
you are my fren.. my dear boy..x)

lalala~

i went crazy last nite again. gees
i was too 'high' again.. lols.. hmmm..
i guess i cant tok on der fone till too late..
i'll go crazy.. and start spoutin nonsense.. lalalas.
but somehow i was heartbroken.
hope you noe hu u are and wat u did and rmb wat u've promised me. =/

we've got alot of free periods. gees..
so fun.. hahas.. went crazy in klaz.. so funn.. x))
but we had 3 periods of chem. oh gosh.
3 periods of dat mrs bitchy ng. oh fark.. she's reali a bitch.
i hate her.. she shall go to hell. and i mean it. argghh..

i skipped work today.. cuz of some stupid reasons.
but end up all my efforts were wasted. forget it.
20 dollars fly away.. hais.. sad case. lols..

hais.. i'll nvr get to see my eye candy.. as long as one day Jy is wif me.. =(

you definitely shocked me last nite..
somehow you shocked me to tear..
duno y, i juz like to cry dis few days..
but, im reali happy.. reali reali..
i dun care even if you are drunk..
but u've reali made my day.. x))

-hais. i reali duno wat to say.. all i can say is, thanks cheefun.. thanks, and i reali mean it ehh.